Saturday, 30 July 2011

...4 Persons...

Life is the process of finding love; every person will need to find four people in their life.

First person is you.
Second person is the one you love most.
Third is the person who love you most.
And the fourth is the one you spend the rest of your love.

Before you can ever find love, you first have to realize what LOVE to you means and essentially directs that knowledge of love to Yourself. After all, you can never really truly give love to anyone unless you have love for your own self. That is why the First Person is you.

After you've established what love means to you, you now brave the fight of shraing yourself and your love to someone else. To this person, you give more that you were capable of and you love without really knowing why, how or what for. You just do. This is the person (you) love the most. Your second person.

Because you know how it is to truly love, you then accept the fate of being loved beyond your own understanding. Here comes the love that brings you back that memory of that Second Person. You recognize the feeling, only it doesn;t spring out of you, but rather, directed to you. After having given your all to someone, you now find the person who will love you the most. Enter, your Third person.

After you've been through the peaks and valleys of love, onceyou've experienced the feeling of loving others and being loved, you realize exactly what you need. And when you finally piece it (and yourself) all together, you find that one person who fits the bill; the person who suits you -perfectly enough to spend the rest of your life with. This is your Fourth Person.

Sadly, in real life, these three people are usually not the same person. The one you love the most doesn't love you the same way; the one who loves you most, is never the one you love the best, and the one you spend your life with, is never the one you love most or the one who love you  most. He is just the person who happens to be at the right place, at the right time in you life.

So now tell me this:

Which person are you in other people's life?
Which person have you found so far?
In this world so big, which person have you found?

And who has found you?

- This one was given to me by an officemate to read. It is given to him by a friend of his. Hope this inspires you the way I was.

Sunday, 24 July 2011

...Dear You..

Dear You,

Ito ako ngayon at litong lito sa mga nararamdaman ko sa bawat pagdaan ng araw., hindi rin naman kita masisi sa kung anu man ito dahil may kasalanan din naman ako.,

Kasalanan kong hinayaan ko ang sarili ko na madama ito, ng hindi ko man lang itinanong muna kung kaya ko ba?., hindi ko man lang naisip na paulit ulit na lang ako sa bagay na ito., ni hindi ko man lang naconsider na ako nanaman ang aasa at masasaktan pagdating ng araw.,

sabihin ko man na hindi ko inaasam na humigit pa ang kung ano man ang meron sa atin eh hindi ko rin naman maloloko ang sarili ko tungkol sa kung anu man ang nararamdaman ko para sayo.,

kung minsan gusto ko na lang sabihin sayo na sana dumating ang isang araw na ako na rin ang nilalaman ng isip at puso mo., pero naiisip ko na mas malaki pa rin ang posibilidad na ang pangarap ko ay isang malaking pangarap na lang, wala na itong patutunguhan kung hindi ang dahan dahan kong tanggapin na ang bawat taong mamahalin ko ay hindi maaring ibalik ang kung anu man ang ibinibigay ko.,

hindi ko sinasabi sa iyo na suklian mo ang kung anu man ang nararamdaman ko para sayo dahil una sa lahat hindi mo naman ito obligasyon at higit sa lahat hindi naman ikaw ang nagsabi sa akin na damhin ko ang nararamdaman ko.,

oo magulo ako sa mga bagay bagay pagdating sa puso kasi hindi ko pa alam kung papaano magkaroon ng isang taong mahal ako at ipinapadama nya ito sa akin ng walang pag-aalinlangan., magulo ako sa kadahilanang hindi ko pa alam kung paano ang ibigin., magulo ako sa kadahilanang
hindi ko maipaliwanag kung bakit ako nahuhulog ng ganito sa isang tao na kahit alam kong aasa lang ako at masasaktan.,

patuloy pa rin ako sa ganitong sitwasyon., ilang beses man akong nasaktan ay ito pa rin ako bumabalik nanaman sa simula., balik sa kung saan man nagsisimula ang unti unting paglaki ng butas nitong aking puso.,

sabihin ko man sa aking sarili na isang araw may darating din na para sa akin ay hindi ko na maitatago ang kakulangan na aking ninanais nang punan., wala ngang nagsabi na magiging madali ang lahat., pero wala rin namang nagsabi na ganito kahirap ang ganito.,


Friday, 22 July 2011

...want to be known for doing this?...

Just because you think that something is cool doesn't mean that it is cool for everyone.

I have nothing against the trends today because I don't really mind what other people wants to do with their lives but in this case where my name can be related to something that other people are doing is just not right.,

I am referring to the PLM Planking., Yes!., Students from my Alma Mater are doing it., I really don't care whether they do it or not., what bothers me is that they are doing it wearing our uniforms and using the University's name.,

Is that what they want to be known for?., just like what my classmate said in his post at facebook., here is what he said.,

Imagine this in a job interview. The interviewer did some background search and then said, "Oh, you're from PLM. I saw your page for Planking. You must be good at it. Sample! Sample!" You know it's an exaggeration. It's funny but it's not how it should be.

I wouldn't want that to happen to me, that is not the way I want to be known for., especially when there is a really really tough industry out there., yes it is tough out here at the real world.,

Not to boast but I do know that students at PLM are the creme of the crop., we are called ISKOLARS., when people ask where I graduated and I would reply "from PLM" their initial reaction is "whoa, so you are really bright"., I don't want the day to come when I say I came from PLM and all they could say is that "is that where the students are so good at Planking?".,

I have read about planking and I found out that this is a game where you pose lying face down in unusual places., A game?., what would you get if you do that?., what's the prize?.,

Yeah! yeah! call me a "kill joy" person but what would you get by doing that., except dirty shirts and threatening your life?., I cannot see what people are trying to achieve by doing that.,

Again, I have nothing against people doing Planking what I am bothered about is that these students are using the university's name and uniform, that is just plain "NOT RIGHT".,

Sunday, 17 July 2011

10 for 22

Looks like it's just a little time until one of the best days in my life is gonna happen.,  No it's not the day that i'll win the lottery and also not the day that I will be a star coz already I am., (just kidding)., ;)
well, kidding aside I will be celebrating my 22nd (ouch! please stop the aging process) birthday., yeah! yeah! I am starting to get old but hey! I can always pretend to be young and also I am young at heart and mind ("isip-bata").,

just to keep this short and simple this is 10 things that I would like to have for my birthday., well not all the things listed here are material things and not all the material things listed here can be bought with one swoop.,

10. New Hoodie Jacket., Well my trusty old jacket (if I may call it a jacket) is now doing me service for more than 1 year so I guess it's just the right time to have a new one., so that I can have alternate jackets at the office., I've been tired washing my jacket on Sundays and to the best of my luck when Mondays come it is not all dried up.

9. A Rubber shoes (you know what I want!)., again I only have one rubber shoes and it came from Cartimar., hehe., I am not complaining about that but I guess it is time for me to have at least one original rubber shoes., I've not have any original rubber shoes since 1st year college and now that I am working I still don't get to buy an original one! (huhuhuhuhuhu!)., :'( but for sure i'll have one...

8. A Sport shirt., lately i've been hooked up with playing badminton and I really don't have a proper outfit., well I was envy of some of my playmate's shirts so I just want to have one., hehe., did I mention that I ripped my shorts apart the last time I played Badminton., that was just pure embarrassing.,

7. A nokia C7., I am not saying that I don't like my phone but I guess it's just the time that I give my good old phone a little break., or maybe pass it on to my parents., why C7?., I really don't know why but when I first saw that phone I just told myself that I should have one of that one of these days., but that "days" hasn't come yet!., hehehe.,

6. A Starbucks Tumbler., just really really want to own one., hehehe., ;)

5. Time., I just want to have more time for myself to enjoy the things that I want to do., hehehehe., a little less time for stress and a bit more time for fun.,

4. To Travel (in and outside the country)., yes!., I want to travel., even though not abroad., I just want to travel the Philippines., see different places with my friends., and take snapshots of the memories there., hehe.,

3. Patience., i've been starting to lose my patience in waiting these couple of months, weeks, days, hours, minutes and seconds., so please please grant me some patience

2. Someone to call my own - enough said!., and can you please add a dash of confidence to tell the one that I like that I like them., hehehehe., ;)

1. Stronger Faith., needs to have a deeper relationship with HIM!

I will not demand for everything on this list to be mine this coming birthday of mine but my plan is to get them a step at a time and after a year before my birthday I hope I have erased most of the things here and have a spot for the new ones.

Sunday, 3 July 2011

wala lang...

Ito ako ngayon nakaupo sa isang sulok ng kwarto at nakatingin sa kanya habang mahimbing siyang natutulog sa aking tabi. Pinagmamasdan ang kanyang maamong mukha. Isang maamong mukha na nakapagpabago ng lahat sa isang iglap lang.

Naaalala ko pa ang mga nangyari...

Matagal tagal na panahon na rin kaming hindi nagkikitang magkakabarkada. Ilang taon na kaming di nagkakasama-sama para magkwentuhan at mag-asaran.

Sinama kita papunta sa bahay ng isa kong kaibigan kung saan kami magkikita kitang magbabarkada. Niyaya kita na sumama at laking gulat ko ng madali ko kitang napapayag na ako'y samahan.

Nasa byahe tayong dalawa papunta sa aking kaibigan ng matanong ka kung bakit ikaw ang aking niyaya. Isang simpleng sagot lang ang narinig mo sa akin. "Wala lang...". Isang ngiti lang ang namutawi sa iyong mukha.

Pagdating na pagdating natin sa bahay ng aking kaibigan ay pumasok na kami agad at naupo sa kanilang sofa. Hinugot nya ang kanyang cellphone at nagtext. Alam ko kung sinu ang kanyang kausap. Ang kanyang kasintahan.

Dumating na rin ang aking mga kaibigan at nagsimula na kaming magkulitan. Ipinakilala kita sa kanilang lahat at mabilis namang naging palagay ang loob nila sa iyo. Mabuti na rin iyon para hindi ka naman ma OP. Kwentuhan, asaran, kulitan, at kung anu anu pang kabulastugan nanaman ang ginawa naming magkakaibigan.

Sinimulan na rin ang inuman. Dahan dahang itinatagay ang isang maliit na baso na may lamang alak. Unti unti ng kinain ng espiritu ng alak ang ating mga kamuwangan. Mas naging maingay at makukulit tayong lahat. Nawala ang mga hiya. Naging maingay at magulo ang lahat.

Di naman ako malakas uminom kaya't ilang ikot ng mga tagay ay may tama na ako. Itinigil ko ang pag inom dahil alam kong di ko kakayanin kapag tumuloy pa ako. Para mawala ng kaunti ang aking tama nagprisinta akong lumabas para bumili ng mapupulutan. Mejo natagalan kami ng isa ko pang kaibigan dahil medyo nalibang kami sa pagkwekwentuhan

Mas naging maingay na kayo ng aking mga kaibigan ng kami'y makabalik hindi ko alam kung bakit pero natuwa rin ako sa aking mga nakikita. Ramdam ko na malapit na kayo sa isa't isa. Parang isa ka na rin sa amin.

Hindi ko na pinoproblema kung makakasabay ka sa akin dahil alam kong isa ka na rin sa amin.

Nagtungo ako sa kusina para ayusin ang aming mga binili. Naunang lumabas sa akin ang kaibigan ko at ako na lang ang mag-isang naiwan. Dahil sa ayaw ko ng uminom at alam kong may mga tama na kayo nagpasya akong maghilamos upang mahimasmasan ng kahit kaunti.

Masaya ako dahil nakasama kita dito sa okasyong ito. Masaya ako at nakilala mo ang mga kaibigan ko. Masaya ako, tapos.

Paglabas ko ng kusina ikaw ang una kong napansin. Tumayo ka sa kinauupuan mo at lumapit sa akin. Bumulong ka sa akin at sinabing "I'm Sorry...". Natigilan ako sa iyong ginawa. Nanlamig ang buo kong katawan. Di ako makagalaw. Anu ang ibig sabihin ng iyong ginawa? Ano ang kahulugan non sa akin? Sa atin?

Wala akong nagawa. Ni hindi ko man lang napigilan ka sa ginawa mo. Ni hindi ko man lang alam kung anu ang magiging reaksyon ko. Natapos ang ilang sigundo ay umalis ka na sa harapan ko. Natapos ang ilang segundo na hindi ko man lang maintindihan kung anu ang nangyari.

Bumalik ako sa kinauupuan ko na magulo pa rin ang isip. Biglang nagsalita ang isa ko pang kaibigan. "Bakit ka namumula?. Dahil ba hinalikan ka nya? Hehehehehe...". Biglang turo sa iyo. Biglang sabat naman ng isa pa na "O tuloy na natin ung game... o sinu na next?"

Madaling araw na ng matapos ang kasiyahan kaya't nagpasya na lang ang lahat na doon na lang matulog. Nasa terrace akong mag-isa at naka-upo. Iniisip ang mga nagyari kanina.

Umupo ka sa aking tabi at binangga mo ang aking siko. "Anung meron? Seryoso ka ata?". Ang sabi ko nama'y "Wala lang".

"Ah ganun ba? Sorry kanina ha?".

"Wala lang yun sa akin. Pero bakit ka pumayag? At saka..."

Di ka na nakasagot sa tanong kong iyon. Nasandal na ang ulo mo sa aking balikat at ikaw mahimbing nang nakatulog. Di mo na maririnig ang mga nasabi ko...

"sana di mo na ginawa yun. Lalo lang akong nalito sa kung ano man itong nararamdaman ko para sayo. Alam kong mali ito pero di ko to kayang pigilan. mali ba ako?...hindi ko naman to ginusto eh., hindi ako ang pumili wala ngang choice na binigay sa akin eh...wala...mahirap...sobra...may ibig sabihin ba iyong halik na yun?...bakit ka ba kasi pumayag sa hamon nila?...bakit?..."


Ito ako ngayon nakaupo sa isang sulok ng kwarto at nakatingin sa kanya habang mahimbing siyang natutulog sa aking tabi. Pinagmamasdan ang kanyang maamong mukha. Isang maamong mukha na nakapagpabago ng lahat sa isang iglap lang.